i have disowned my best friend's brother... They are still brother and sister and we are still best friends, it's not a big a deal.. nothing to loose and achieve just peace of mind
I have had a similar situation and found myself disowning someone close rather unconsciously but then I decided to revert that... I guess one would disown someone close to buy himself peace of mind but it won't necessarily work like that. Especially if it's someone close. I guess it's a compromise between being frustrated with someone and feeling guilty about disowning him/her. Perhaps it could help to focus on the root cause and set boundaries. In my case I found that I was associating too many of my personal problems to that person and in a way I was using that someone as an excuse for my own failures. Ever since, I have been trying to separate these and also put boundaries. I won't get myself involved into his/her problems and I won't let him/her interfere with my personal life. But still I like to have that person as a close relative, …aside from the possibility of feeling guilty a few year down the road, I though I might associate my future failures with not having that person in my life and being too much emotionally involved with the story of disowning that person! Bottom line, I guess it’s all about the tricks that our thoughts play on us. I wish I could be more in control of my thoughts and feelings.
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i have disowned my best friend's brother...
They are still brother and sister and we are still best friends, it's not a big a deal.. nothing to loose and achieve
just peace of mind
I have thought about it at times and the overwhelming amount of guilt kills me...
I have had a similar situation and found myself disowning someone close rather unconsciously but then I decided to revert that... I guess one would disown someone close to buy himself peace of mind but it won't necessarily work like that. Especially if it's someone close. I guess it's a compromise between being frustrated with someone and feeling guilty about disowning him/her. Perhaps it could help to focus on the root cause and set boundaries. In my case I found that I was associating too many of my personal problems to that person and in a way I was using that someone as an excuse for my own failures. Ever since, I have been trying to separate these and also put boundaries. I won't get myself involved into his/her problems and I won't let him/her interfere with my personal life. But still I like to have that person as a close relative, …aside from the possibility of feeling guilty a few year down the road, I though I might associate my future failures with not having that person in my life and being too much emotionally involved with the story of disowning that person! Bottom line, I guess it’s all about the tricks that our thoughts play on us. I wish I could be more in control of my thoughts and feelings.
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