it's hard to write about nothing with so many things going on... wait, i should correct myself, with so many things going on in my head. it's always in my head. i think my head is fat, not as fat as google though. everything is in google, and many things are in my head. the new waitress from the the vietnamese place is also in my head. the guy on the other table asked her if she's got a boyfriend, she said she does, but he's back home. i wonder if he's cheating on her, i wonder if she'll cheat on him too. i wonder if she can go back, i mean is she even legal? can i go back?

i got a quote for my ticket today. third time this month, not buying of course. the conversation makes me feel like it's happening. she asks me if i'm flexible, do i mind leaving on monday, maybe i wouldn't, it's cheaper, i don't. i get a quote with air france too, thinking i could make a stop to visit my aunt on the way, how many days in paris, two should do, i hear her keyboard as she clicks away my imaginary itinerary with her long fake nails, i recognize the hollow squeak, our secratary uses them. i ask for her name, just to make sure i won't talk to her the next time i call. she calls me dear, i think she's into me. i hang up.

school started on monday and i'm already burned out. work is worse than ever, and they skipped my review this year : no money to spare. it's getting too hot again. i'm starting to have some feelings abour ultra liberals too : i think i hate them as much as the ultra conservatives. ultra sucks. ultra is destructive. it's good that r is not as close to me nowadays, i'd have spent all my money on toxic dried leaves, not that i have any, but still.

this is bullshit, it's all in my head. i just need to go back home, i really do. i'm calling the agency tomorrow...